Sunday, April 1, 2018

Burn, Baby, Burn ...

... Our collection of would-be heroes stole into the Ratling village under the veil of shadows and darkness. Nearly a week had gone by, which they spent licking their wounds while the Ratlings bolstered up their security. The trash strewn paths of the village had armed guards patrolling in the moons' pale glow.

After ambushing several guards and making their way to what seemed to be a barracks of sorts, a keen eyed pair of Ratling guards spied unnatural movement in the shadows; the party had been spotted.

Spells from beyond the face of normalcy stretched across the decrepit village and strange Psionics pounded the minds of Ratlings into pulp. Axes and swords sang dirges of terrible strength under the two moons; songs bidding a swift farewell to scurrying rodent men.

Then, a turning point in our narrative unfolded like the wings of some nocternal predator ... the nicotine addicted duck, Mazzlethorn - out of useful spells at the moment - lit a torch. Jackowyld echoed the nic-fitting fowl and stumbled upon the same idea as the frustrated duck. They began setting foetid huts on fire.

Panicked screams tore through the night, as Ratlings roasted in their straw beds. No longer could we consider these mercenaries would-be heroes, and this narrator wonders if they ever were ...

A Ratling guard, wounded and begging for it's miserable life told the group that Zeezeeks, the Wizard, would not let this atrocity go unpunished. Mocked by the groups laughter, the guard revealed that the Wizard could see the burning village from his mountain top lair. Those words were the guards last, as Targ0z stomped the vile creature's head into the moist jungle dirt ...

Thursday, March 15, 2018

Mistakes Were Made ...

... At the crack of dawn, our would-be heroes were already making their way
through the thick jungle. Targ0z lead the way, cutting a path through the dense foliage with his sword. Before long, they found themselves peering into a clearing where the Ratling village sat; its ramshackle shacks and crude tents offending both eyes and noses, for the smell of garbage and refuse overwhelmed the odour of the steamy jungle. The sight and smell was compounded by the teeming number of vile Ratlings crawling over and through the filth.

Everyone readied their weapons and approached the village. The Ratlings, clearly seeing the group emerging from the forest, readied their weapons as well and stood waiting for them. There was a short stand-off as the two groups took measure of each other, which was broken by the high pitched squeal of attack by the Ratlings. Daggers. Swords and Spells erupted on the battlefield, but our would-be heroes found themselves quickly overrun by the rodent-like attackers and severe wounds were dealt to them, Jackowyld, the Poompkin Chimera, being rendered in twain by the scurrying menace. The Ratlings gave chase as the party retreated back into the jungle. Several hours of fleeing into the wild satisfied the group that they had lost the creatures in the forest, and they took rest by a freshwater river.

Jackowyld focused on resting, permitting his accelerated regeneration to regrow his plant-based lower half. Ormand, the Orkan Holy Warrior sat and sharpened his axe in anticipation of further attack, while the clockwork man, Targ0z stood and vigorously polished out the marks of battle upon his chassis, such was his strange psychosis. Mazzlethorn, the duck sorcerer, fidgeted in the tension, his need for a smoke getting the better of him. Chadd, the Numan, sat and meditated upon his spells and bizarre psychic abilities, readying himself for an ambush as well.

Finally, after some healing and recuperation, the heroes formulated an alternate plan of attack. They would wait for nightfall and sneak into the village of the Ratmen and stealthily eliminated them in smaller, more manageable, numbers. They gathered themselves up and headed back into the jungle for a counter attack ...

Thursday, March 8, 2018

Once Upon a Time ...

... The waves tossed the ship from side to side, causing great discombobulation for the crew. Ropes, once snugly tied into position, flung wildly in the great torrent from the sea. Lightning flashed wickedly, only to illuminate the terror on the crew's faces as the storm raged on. Men who lost their footing in the cyclone were thrown mercilessly into the drink. Our heroes, though they did not think of themselves as such, sprung into action, desperately trying to save riggings and sailors alike.

Their bold actions to save both ship and crew were, alas, in vain; for the might of the storm hurled the ship into the rocks, and with it, our heroes were washed ashore. As they arose from unconsciousness, they huddled together in the jungle, seeking the shelter that the great canopy would provide from the driving rain. It was here, in the unknown wilds of the desert isle they came to know one another.

There was Jackowyld, a Poompkin Chimera who worshipped the Great Earthmother. A Clockwork Man designated Talgg0z called himself a Spellsword. There was Chadd, a Numan hailing from the future where floating cities of Gold and Crystal sailed among the clouds. Ormand was a Orkan Holy Warrior of the Orkacle and Master of the Great Axe. Then, there was the Duck, Mazzlethorn - Mad Mallard of the Mystic Arts. Together they hunkered down as the rain pounded the canopy of foliage above them.

Jackowyld spotted light coming from deeper within the forest and prompted the group of would-be heroes toward it. The Clockwork Man lead the group deeper into the jungle, followed closely by Jackowyld, Ormand, and Chadd. Mad Mazzlethorn, wringing out one of his damp cigars in disgust, brought up the rear, complaining loudly as he went.

Suddenly, there were leather wings and blood seeking teeth about them. Jackowyld and Ormand were bitten before they could react, but Chadd, using his strange psychic powers, blasted one of the hairy beasts before it could draw more blood. Talgg0z's sword also found flesh beneath the thick hair of the winged beast. But before the struggle was finished, the two bitten heroes succumbed to the poison of the Winged Hairies and were nearly suffocating under newly sprouting hair all over their bodies. Jackowyld's hair grew in great coils and he gasped for breath and Ormand produced great green braids that nearly strangled him where he stood.

As quickly as the ambush began, it was over and the two hirsute heroes began shaving off their newly grown lockes. Jackowyld styled his into an afro, complete with great sideburns that were quite handsome, if not unusual, for a Poompkin; while Ormand would have nothing to do with green braids that detracted from his spikey head.

Soon, they were cutting a trail through the bush toward the lights burning ahead in the jungle and not long after that, they came upon the source of the lights - a primitive village made of thatch huts. The denizens of the village came out to greet the novice heroes and question them as to who they were and from where did they hail. Jackowyld told them they were heroic adventurers who had become shipwrecked on their island and this excited the villagers.

They were brought before their fat king, who was constantly eating a strange pudding out of a seashell. He asked the party if they were mighty. Jackowyld said they were indeed mighty. The King asked them if they were warriors, all the while filling his mouth with the lavender pudding. Ormand stated firmly they were not only warriors, but mighty warriors. This pleased the King and he made an offer to the would-be heroes.

"Long ago, a Poompkin sailing ship crashed among the rocks, much like your ship did, in a mighty storm. No one survived the crash except Ratlings ... these Ratling, along with their powerful wizard, Zeezeek, have long harassed our village, sometimes burning our huts and stealing our women. If you can destroy the Ratlings and their Wizard, we will furnish you with a bar of solid gold and a new boat so that you might return to your loved ones, or perhaps continue your adventuring ways." His chin was dribbling with pudding as he awaited an answer.

Jackowyld said they had a deal, to which the King exclaimed "Luau!!!"! and with that, dancing girls awarded the new found heroes leis of great floral beauty and a feast was to be held in honor of the agreement. They would set out toward the mountain in the morning, the last known settlement of the Ratlings ...